All relationships have their ups and downs and Han and Leia's should be no exception, right? We all love to think about their 'happily ever after' but without a few bumps along the way, it would probably get a little boring. But why is it that in the EU and most fanfic, I believe, that Leia is the one to cause the most trouble? She is the one with old suitors crawling out of the woodwork, or Princes wanting to form 'unions', or random men just generally falling in love with her out of the sky.
Hello? Wouldn't Han Solo garner some of his own attention/trouble? Sure, maybe no Princess would be looking to 'combine assets' with him in the monetary sense, but - uh, there are other reasons for attraction and Han has most of them. And he is older and has more of a past. Wouldn't he have some girl friends crawling out of the woodwork? He also has looks and personality, wouldn't he have women falling out of the sky in love with him? (Author raises her hands and volunteers for this role wholeheartedly.)
So, why do we (most of us) feel compelled to put the blame on poor old Leia? I mean, Han nearly becomes eligible to be canonized by the time he becomes interested in her. He swears off sex for three years while he waits patiently for her to come to her senses. He sticks around her Rebellion just because he is worried about her and likes her. He gives up his career later on so she can become the New Republic what-have-you and doesn't say a thing in protest. Really? (These are all just generalizations and I realize that there are differing stories out there - don't shoot me)
I wondered if it was because we are all writing our perfect man via Han Solo. I mean what else is fanfic if it is not fantasy? Who wants to write about a husband/boy friend who is a complete jerk? I find it much more relaxing to write about a man who somehow understands and listens to Leia than a man who treats her like dirt and doesn't appreciate her.
But then I thought of something else. I think most of us are women (as far as we know) and it is always easier to see the faults in ourselves than in someone else, so is it easier to write about 'misguided' Leia than it is to write about a 'cheating' Han? IDK.
I really don't try to write Han as some perfect guy. But, really, even when I make him make mistakes, they really aren't all that bad and the man is damn near a saint compared to my real life husband! (Not that I fantasize that Han is my pretend husband or that my real life husband isn't wonderful in his own way).
Or is it all perfectly justified? Leia is that Type A personality. Strong-willed. Stubborn. Ambitious. Tightly-wound. Workaholic. Those are recipes for relationship trouble. And Han is the Type B. Relaxed. Easy going. Patient. And he is older and more mature. I'm sure he understands a whole lot more about Leia's feelings before she herself realizes them. I guess the answer is somewhere in the middle, huh?
Again, I know this is all just generalization and I'm sure most of you could find a story that shows a different side of this. But OVERALL, I do think Leia is written as the one who: First, resists the relationship (of course that comes straight out of the movies) and Second: who then causes more problems for the relationship down the line, whether it be her job, or another suitor or whatever. Anyway... Does anyone else have any thoughts about this??