Sunday, October 29, 2017

Edge of Victory I: Conquest: The Review

Welcome back to the second least active place for Han and Leia fans on the internet. And now we return to the EU book reviews, and since we do these in order, this one certainly isn't going to help very much in gaining interest, because Han and Leia aren't even in it. At all. They are mentioned, usually unfavorably, but that's it. Great. The good news is that the fact that Han and Leia aren't in it should make for a pretty quick review, certainly with very few quotes.

So, this is totally an Anakin Solo book. It focuses almost entirely on him alone and his story. It was so nice of them to give him a book right before they killed him off, wasn't it? So, we begin by being reminded that the Jedi are in trouble. Basically the Vong want them all dead, and there is a group called the Peace Brigade which sounds like a nice name for a group of people who want pretty bad things. Basically they want to help round up the Jedi and sacrifice them to the Vong so that the Vong will leave everyone else alone. Nice, right?

Then we are with Luke and several of the Jedi, mainly including Kyp and the Solo children, who aren't really children anymore as we're reminded that Anakin is 16 and the twins are 18. Basically Kyp thinks it's insane that Luke just wants to sit back and "defend" since they are Jedi and thinks it's time they step up and really start looking out for themselves. This is why I'm never totally clear on what counts as "defense" or not. I mean, in A New Hope Obi Wan slices someone's arm off just because he was going to fight Luke a little bit. Maybe try starting with a little Force push and then see if you need to escalate to severing an arm? Maybe? I don't know. Anyway...

Kyp thinks it's time to start going on the offensive, looking out for their own. Jedi for Jedi, as he puts it. Luke, of course, disagrees. The argument gets them nowhere and then Kyp tells Jaina and Anakin that their uncle is turning into Obi Wan and getting lost in philosophy at the expense of action. Anakin is starting to think he's right, and they even discuss Jacen's unwillingness to use the Force except when it came to saving his own mother. Kyp leaves Anakin and Jaina alone and Jacen then comes to join them. He agrees with Luke, which leaves him and Anakin on opposing sides and Jaina insists that they stop arguing. They discuss where the Jedi may be most vulnerable if the Vong were to target anything specifically, and Anakin has a very strong feeling that they might go after the praxeum on Yavin Four, which happens to be where his best friend Tahiri is, along with many other young Jedi in training.

Now we go to a quiet moment between Luke and Mara. During this time she shares a whole bunch of cliches about how miserable pregnancy is and that she should want to kill Luke and that he is never, ever allowed to do this to her again. I suppose we should be glad that Leia never said stuff like that to Han when she was pregnant. Mara is a lot less into the pregnancy thing, but then this one wasn't planned and it generally seems like the Solo kids were, so maybe that makes a difference. Luke uses the line, "How can I please you, sweetheart?" which only made me really glad that a sentence like that would never come out of Han Solo's mouth, unless he was trying to be sarcastic.

Anyway, they discuss how Luke is worried about Anakin, because he has been through so much at such a young age and Luke thinks that Anakin still believes Han blames him for Chewie's death. And that Anakin is still pretty angry about some things and he is an awful lot like Kyp. But he still thinks he's immortal. Oh don't worry, just a couple more books and he will find out exactly how not immortal he is. They discuss how Anakin and Jacen didn't have normal childhoods and both had very different reactions to the same situation. After they are done talking about how Luke is very worried about what might happen, the Solo kids show up.

They tell Luke of their worries about Yavin Four, and Luke thinks they are probably right but that there isn't much they can do about it at the moment. Apparently Karrde is on his way to help evacuate the students but they have to just wait. After Luke tells them to just leave it, Anakin proves he is such a Solo by totally not listening to him and taking it upon himself to go to Yavin Four anyway. He's mad because all the adults he knows still treat him like a kid when he totally isn't one. He thinks the only one who really understands him is Mara, since she also was never truly a child. But since he knows Tahiri, his best friend is in trouble, he doesn't even hesitate.

Almost immediately upon Anakin's arrival, a fleet from the Peace Brigade shows up. Anakin gets down to the planet and first finds Kam Solusar, who is in charge, and very quickly finds Tahiri, who is not at all happy with him because apparently he's totally been doing that guy thing of not at all keeping in touch. He notices that she is starting to look a lot more grown up now that she is all of 14 years old. She doesn't want to let him out of her sight but he thinks they should be separated as he doesn't want to see anything happen to her.

So Anakin clearly has a lot of guilt as he discusses how so many people have died because of him, including Chewbacca.

"My grandfather was Darth Vader, and he killed billions. But that was after deĆ­cades of the dark side. I'm only sixteen, and look what I've done. Darth Vader would be proud."

Ouch. This kid has some issues to work out. He is told those deaths were not his fault, and then he says that he wanted to kill all of the Vong at Centerpoint and would've if his brother hadn't stopped him. But in the end, it really was his own decision. He still feels like he should've done it though. Lots of tension and Tahiri being mad that Anakin hasn't said anything to her for a while, and Anakin totally looking at her differently than what used to just be his childhood friend. Anakin and Tahiri get separated, Anakin is with some other Jedi and a pilot for the Peace Brigade who mentions the plan to turn the Jedi over.

Now Luke is trying to get the help of the New Republic and Borsk Fey'lya, who has really zero interest in aiding them in any way. So Jacen and Jaina are going to go and help out while Luke and Mara have to stay behind. And I forgot that the twins didn't know Mara was pregnant until they find out in this book and are of course happy for her and excited they are finally getting a cousin.

So Anakin decides he needs to trek back to find Tahiri, who has been captured by the Vong and is basically being tortured by the shapers. Sounds fun, huh? Anyway, he finds and sort of befriends a "shamed" Vong who needs to go to the same place as Anakin and they are working together so Anakin is going to act as his slave. He has to hide inside the belly of a beast, literally, and then there is this briefly cute little bit:

He was reminded of the story of how his mother and father had met, on the Death Star, a story he'd heard far too many times. Seconds after seeing each other for the first time, they'd ended up fleeing stormtroopers into a garbage hold.

 "What an incredible smell you've discovered," his fa - ther had sarcastically told his future wife. He hadn't been very happy with her at the time.

 I've found a better smell than you did, Mom, he thought.


I just think it's cute that he apparently heard that story a lot growing up. Anyway, lots of trekking and Vong stuff and eventually Anakin finally gets to the Vong who have Tahiri and she has been brainwashed to think she is one of them and Anakin has to bring her back and make her realize he is not just a dream and he tells her that he loves her. Aw, so of course that makes her realize he's really there. Anyway, of course they escape, this time in a Vong ship that Tahiri has to fly because they are sort of living beings and now she kind of knows their language, and they wind up of course meeting up with Karrde and Kam with the rest of the young Jedi who need to evacuate.


Jacen and Jaina show up to help the battle so that everyone can escape and all the Solo children are back together again and everyone is safe. Anakin and Jacen have a discussion about how Anakin still feels that the solution is to fight, while Jacen of course thinks that is a bad idea but does wrinkle his forehead in such a way that apparently makes him look just like Han. Anakin and Tahiri are good again even though she has been through quite a lot, and that is pretty much it.

So, the Han and Leia factor for this book is pretty simple since they are not in it at all: 0. Flat out zero. It's not a terrible book, but if you are in this for the Han and Leia then you'd be really, really disappointed. It's just sad that this is just about Anakin's last book, and reminds you what a huge waste his entire character was. The only good news I have to offer you is that I already read the next book and Han and Leia are in it quite a bit and there are several nice moments there. The bad news is there are also several moments where people seem to be pretty judgy about their parenting. I guess we can't have everything.

I figured writing a review for a book Han and Leia weren't even in wouldn't be as time consuming, but it pretty much was exactly as time consuming!

Friday, October 20, 2017

Can We Talk About These Photos? And Can One of You Write a Story Inspired By Them?

Ok, I'm behind because I have been busy, so you guys are probably all like... oh, we've been looking at these pictures for weeks. Where have YOU been? I'm betting though that nobody will ever get tired of these being brought back up. I think I'd rather not spend too much time dwelling on the real-life aspects of this. Honestly I recently re-read The Princess Diarist and somehow it is both more and less depressing now that Carrie is gone. I will say that to me these photos do not look like two people who are just friends whose affair has ended. But again, I don't really want to debate any of that, because the one person who may have told us the truth is gone. So, anyway...

Can we just pretend this is Han and Leia? And can someone write a nice little story to go along with it? Maybe they're dancing at someone's wedding. Or a big celebration of the victory. Heck I could even pretend this goes with a story I wrote of them dancing. I said this to more than one person, that first, I almost can't believe these photos exist. And once again it makes me wonder what gems are still hiding and may one day be unearthed for our viewing pleasure. Second, I find these photos adorable. But also sad. But kind of almost too adorable to be sad. Like they just look so happy that I almost can't be sad to think about what "truth" may lie behind them, or the fact that Carrie is no longer with us, and what fun we'd have had Tweeting them to her and waiting for her to comment. So, well, let's just pretend it's Han and Leia and let this offer a nice visual.