Sunday, April 15, 2018

Why We Should Never Publicly Bash Our Own Writing

I drafted this post quite a while ago, but felt it was important to finally put it up.

Ok, so I think almost every fanfic writer I've ever interacted with or read anything from has times of insecurity or feeling inadequate about their writing. We've all written something and been less than proud of it, or gone back to old stories and wondered how we could possibly have ever written something so terrible. Or we'll read something from another author and think, wow, my work is so vastly inferior to this that I should just quit writing right this minute and never return because I can't possibly compare to that. This happens to most of us. Seriously, probably even that person whose writing you think is on a level you could never comprehend. Yes, that one. The good news is that it can often help us with our desire to learn and grow as writers. But there can be a downside to that as well.

Now, here is one thing I've seen, and been guilty of myself, and it is to announce either in a summary or an author's note that your story isn't very good. Don't do that! How does that inspire anyone to read your story? Let the reader decide whether they like it or not, don't decide that for them. If they don't like it, that's their decision, and hopefully they just keep it to themselves and move on and read something else. But hey, maybe someone out there might like it!

Which brings me to another point. By saying that your story is terrible, you're kind of insulting anyone out there who might have read it and liked it. Look, I myself have stories of mine that I'm not that proud of. The ones I wrote a long time ago, the ones that I'd probably do a George Lucas Special Edition on if I had the patience or desire. I cringe at some characterizations or scenes that I've written. But the thing is, someone out there liked every single one of them. I will still get a new favorite here or there or maybe even a review. And yes, part of me kind of cringes like, wow, you liked THAT one? But the thing about fanfic is that there is something for everyone. And at the time I wrote some of those stories, they were the kind of stories I wanted to see, and clearly someone else was interested enough to read them too. So why should I tell them my story is terrible and make them feel bad about liking it?

Another big problem with bashing your own writing is that someone somewhere has probably read what you've written and not only really likes it, but compares their own writing to it. They see what you wrote, and think, well, I could never write something that good. So then how do you suppose that person feels if not only do they already think your writing is way better than yours, but then they see that you are telling them that it is terrible? At that point that person probably wouldn't dream of trying to publish something if they think your writing is vastly superior to theirs, and you're now telling them that your writing is terrible. So how bad must their stuff be if you are calling your own writing terrible? I think it only serves to further discourage people who were already worried about posting.

I get it, and like I said, I'm guilty of it as well. I know we all like to come across as humble and to not toot our own horns. That's ok, too, I'm not saying any of us have to walk around touting our writing as the next Shakespeare or JK Rowling. I'm just saying that we aren't doing ourselves or anyone else any favors when we walk around trying to convince everyone that our writing is crappy, or inferior to anyone else's. We're all different writers, and that is part of what makes it all more interesting. How boring would it be if we all wrote the same or could be easily ranked from best to worst? And why should anyone even be considered the best or the worst? It's all subjective, and there is room for all of us. Don't compare yourself to others, don't apologize for your own writing or tell people it's terrible. Nobody is obligated to read what you've written, just put it out there and let the reader decide what they think of it.

Keep in mind that most of your thoughts of inadequacy have been felt by every other writer who has ever posted a story around here. Most of us have the same anxieties and worries that our writing isn't as good as that person's, or this person's, or just good enough in general. Or that our story is boring or that nobody will want to read it, or that people will judge us as humans because we can't know what we're talking about because we've never experienced something we're writing about. It doesn't matter. We're all just writing, trying to come up with good stories and do the best we can. Don't stress about it, and don't make a habit of disparaging your own writing because more often than not you're not even just hurting yourself by saying these things, you're hurting others.

I realize some people may disagree, or feel like how other people feel about their own writing or inadequacy isn't your responsibility. And you're right to a point. The thing about fanfic writing though to me is that more than anything, it is a community. And it doesn't really work well if there isn't some community aspect to it. I mean, think about it: would it be anywhere near as fun or interesting if only one person wrote stories? Even if they were all fantastic stories, it's still fun to read things from lots of different people. And we can always use new writers, so it's important to create as encouraging an environment as possible to get more people to start writing and sharing their stuff. You never know where the next great story will come from, or what stories we've missed out on because someone felt like they weren't good enough to write or post.  


10 comments:

  1. Wow, this is an excellent post, Kels, and very timely for me. It is precisely what I need to read today (and what I should have been reading every day over the past several months).

    Like most writers, I have insecurities that flare up from time to time and make me hyper-critical of everything I write (or try to write). I found some very old stories of mine online from c. 1998 and cringed to see that I had written in the A/N at the beginning of one of them something like "I know it sucks" and then again at the end "I know this was awful...". The truth is, I knew even then that it wasn't truly awful, but I guess it's a combination of genuine insecurity, and not wanting to seem full of myself or arrogant. I've got an ingrained need to display humility when offering something I've created, I guess, even if I think privately This is pretty good. I like it!

    I think you make an especially good point with this comment:

    "...someone somewhere has probably read what you've written and not only really likes it, but compares their own writing to it. They see what you wrote, and think, well, I could never write something that good. So then how do you suppose that person feels if not only do they already think your writing is way better than yours, but then they see that you are telling them that it is terrible?"

    It's one thing to put myself down, but quite another to think about how that impacts on others. I think that thought more than anything will check me next time I have the impulse to say something disparaging of what I've written.

    That, and the fact that most of what I've written is likewise written by beloved JG, too, and any insults I may level at myself must inevitably hit her. Yikes!

    Time to own up and say, "I think our stories are pretty good. I like 'em!" lololol

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    1. Zyra, not Kels. :) I didn't write this. This comes from the fantastic brain of Zyra, who is much wiser than I am when it comes to things like this. I bash my own writing to no end, and she's absolutely right about NOT doing it. I have more thoughts on this but I have to put them together to respond cogently to her excellent post.

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    2. Doh! Sorry, Zyra. Look at the time stamp! I should never post at stupid-o-clock. :)

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    3. No worries, honest mistake!

      We are ALL guilty of this, for sure. I am just as much as anyone else. And I will probably still do it from time to time. I just think it's important for all of us to be aware of it and think more about it.

      Part of it I think is just that social conditioning thing where we're not supposed to be too confident and we should always make sure not to act like we like ourselves or anything we do too much. But we can like our stuff without being superior to others, I promise!

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  2. These are all excellent points, and certainly give me cause to look back and think about how many times I have been guilty of all these things. Self-disparaging comments? Check. My inner voice can be very cruel, and say things I'd never think let alone say about anyone else's work, so why do I listen to it when it says such things about me? Author's notes that say right off the bat not to expect too much? Check. I read other people's stories with such a sense of anticipation, why would I deny someone that excitement about mine by telling them I think it's crap?

    You've really put all that in perspective here, and made me look at it differently. I think it's so important to encourage new writers and help them feel confident enough in their own abilities to post, and if my offhand remarks do the opposite I shall make a conscious effort to cease and desist. That comes with a sincere apology to anyone whom I might have discouraged in the past.

    Get writing out there, folks...especially you new authors who might be sitting on the edge of the pool! Drabble or multi-chapter, your work is wanted, appreciated, and bound to be enjoyed, so dive in. :)

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    1. We ALL do them, for sure. And I'm sure we will all continue to do them to some degree. My hope is more just that people will think a little more before doing these things. At the very least we could aim not to preface our stories with anything negative. And I also think we shouldn't make it seem like you MUST be overly critical of your own writing in order to be humble or something, because that isn't true either.

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  3. Another thoughtful post, Zyra, which I think applies to writing and life in general. I don’t know if it’s social conditioning, or what, but I think many of us (women, in particular), tend to put ourselves and our abilities down. And to what end? So others will tell us we’re actually good? So we’re not let down if what we do isn’t as well-received as we'd hoped?

    I was playing ball with my young daughter the other day, and twice she said something to the effect of, “I’m no good at this.” I stopped and reminded her that she would never say that to or about someone else, and I wished she wouldn’t say it about herself either. Advice I need to heed as well.

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  4. This is excellent advice - I had never considered that if you didn't like your own writing, what does it say to someone who does - terrific point.

    I am always thrilled to see new writers hopping in, especially now, especially into the OT. I try and encourage them because we need new folks - I want to see the stories they can tell along with everyone coming back to writing or who have been here forever. Like the little cartoon - I want two cakes! I want a whole dessert table!

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    1. I try to be encouraging, generally, but I really need to read more and REVIEW everything. I am so far behind. I know from experience that nothing beats getting a handful of reviews to motivate and encourage more writing, so I really need to do my part and let those new (and returning) writers know their work is appreciated.

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    2. I agree. It is exciting to see a boom of interest, and the only way to keep it building is to be positive, about ourselves and the other authors. I view it as getting a present, and proper manners say if you open the present, you write a thank you note. We all know, from our discussion last post, how agonizing it can be to publish, and every iota of appreciation goes a long way. I don't feel I'm behind on reviews, but sadly I'm behind on reading. And writing.

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