So Many Ideas…So Little Time

Just to forewarn you, I wrote this post last night when I was, let's just say a little moody.  It could possibly be classified as a rant.  Anyway:  Enjoy it for what it is...

I have only been writing fanfic for about two years now, so you probably won’t get a lot of blog posts from me offering tons of advice.  If anything I’ll be asking for help or sharing my frustrations.  I still feel like I have so much to learn.  Where’s Yoda when you need him? 

I find myself stymied lately by a problem that Zyra tells me isn’t a problem at all.  But like any other disorder or ailment, I say she should walk a mile in my shoes before she passes judgment on my suffering. 

Just what is my problem?  I have too many ideas. 

In the beginning I was struck with inspiration and I saw that inspiration through until I had posted an entire story.  Oh, I remember those days fondly.  Those were the good old days, the times I can now talk about and preface every sentence with, “Back in the day…” 

Now, I haven’t even typed up a rough draft of some idea before another creeps up into the limelight vying for my attention.  I cannot ignore it.  History has only proven to me that if I don’t write what comes to me when I have it, I’ll just lose it.  So, I’ve abandoned one incomplete story for the tantalizing idea of another one, only to do it all over again come morning.  It’s a vicious cycle and left in its wake is nothing but incomplete conversations and unfinished scenarios.

And what happens when I revisit them?  Well, let me tell you, it’s so very hard to go back and rekindle that flame.  It’s like returning to a high school boyfriend.  It’s nearly impossible to find what you had seen in the thing in the first place.  Now my hard drive is riddled with pathetic orphans of ideas.  I feel a maddening desire to just throw them all together into some sort of twisted gumbo of a story - an anthology of deserted dreams.

Sometimes I think I’m not that far off from my answer.  As if maybe I am trying to build a massive story arc of events and I’m unable to see the forest for the trees.  I also wonder when I became so damned self-critical.  I know Zyra posted a topic that went something along the lines of “They don’t all have to be Amazing”.  I think she did that for me.  I think she’s tired of hearing me beat myself up and complain. 

Back in the day this never happened…

Okay, I guess my rant is complete.  Time to move on to another idea, frustration or innocuous topic.  Just one thing, though:  If there is anybody out there that can relate, I'd love to hear it.  You know what they say about misery, well, it's totally true!