Monday, August 26, 2013

"A Polite Conversation" by Blamey77

This is a "Han's Birthday Challenge" Submission by Blamey77.  Thanks for sharing!  :-)


A Polite Conversation


"When is your birthday, Captain?"

"Why? You thinkin' of planning a surprise party?" Han asked, with a grin.

"No, I'm just curious," answered Leia.

"If you were thinking of a surprise party, I would be fine with that."

"Oh, really?" she asked, drily.

"Yeah. So long as the surprise is a beautiful woman waiting in my cabin with wine and balloons. What do you say, Princess? Can you clear your schedule?"

"Could you possibly be anymore inappropriate?" Leia snapped in response.

"Is that an actual request because I could go on-"

Leia abruptly stood up, ready to storm out of the falcon. She wondered why she bothered coming here. The uncouth captain seemed continually determined to prove her worst expectations about him.

"Hey, wait," Han said, putting his hand on her arm. "I'm sorry."

Leia shot him a frustrated look. "Is it possible for you to go one conversation without making an innuendo?"

"Yes," Han said firmly. "I think."

Leia raised her eyebrow at him.

"Hey, give me a break. I've never tried it before!"

She couldn't stop a small smile from appearing on her face. Han grinned in response.

"Please sit. We'll start over," he said, sitting back down. His posture was straight and he had his hands clasped in front of him in an exaggerated display of decorum.

The Princess bit her lip to muffle her own grin. She slid back into the booth.

"So, what were we talking about?"

Leia eyed him warily and answered, "Your birthday."

"Can I ask why you want to know?"

"I told you, I'm just curious," she said, slightly blushing.

Leia had been reading the smuggler's file when she noticed the absence of a birth date. Her curiosity had been piqued over the omission. It seemed like a harmless piece of information.

"I don't know the actual date I was born," Han said, matter-of-factly, "At some point; I just picked a date and stuck with it."

Leia tried to conceal her surprise at his admission.

Han shrugged. "I've never really paid much attention to my birthday- except to add another year to my age. Chewie usually tries to put something together on the day."

"Like a party?" Leia asked.

"Yeah, I guess you could call it that. He cooks dinner, buys beer, washes the dishes that night..."

Leia couldn't stop herself from suddenly erupting in laughter.

"I'm sorry," she said in response to his startled expression, "It's just a funny image and...it's sweet."
She covered her mouth but couldn't stop giggling.

"This is what I get for trying to have a polite conversation," Han said, shaking his head.

49 comments:

  1. Very cute! Thanks for sharing it. It put a smile on my face. :-)

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  2. I like it! Nice piece and in character.

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  3. I loved this! Very in character, funny, and sweet. It was so nice to read this! Thank you for a great end to a very long first day back at work :)

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  4. Cool, thanks for writing this! I wouldn't have thought to take the challenge to go back before they were together but this is a nice conversation I can see them having when they are still figuring each other out. Thanks for sharing :)

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    1. Thanks! I tried to write something involving Leia throwing Han a birthday party but StatsGrandma's one was too good ;)
      So I widened the scope, thinking it has to involve his birthday somehow... if not an actual party.

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    2. Ok, so I just got an idea for another one.

      Does the challenge expire? Do you mind another very late submission?
      If only our inspiration and ideas had switches we could turn on when its most convenient :)

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    3. Blamey -- you should write your birthday party story! I'm not the last word on it ;)

      And you write good stuff.

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  5. I've always held that Han didn't know his actual birthdate so seeing someone else write it out is cool. Totally in character... loved it

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    1. I'm glad we had the same idea :)

      I'm pretty clueless as to the official 'canon' so I wasn't sure if we knew Han's birth date, if someone had decided on one. So I think the idea came from that- what if Han decided when his own birthday was? The reason he would have to choose his own birthday is sad, but I tried to keep the writing light- I think after 30 or so years, he'd be pretty laid back about it (or at least would have perfected his unflappable attitude by then) ;)

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    2. It is, in fact, canon (EU canon, at least) that Han does not know his exact birth date to the day or even year. What I don't get is how he ends up knowing some of his family. Any experts care to weigh in?

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    3. That is one of those things that really bugs me about the EU. Han has a cousin who looks just like him but his aunt can't even tell him his mother's name???

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    4. Also, it is apparent that they don't have Google in the GFFA. You'd think those sorts of records would be easier to search. Also worth noting is that apparently Jaina was Han's mother's name, except there seems to be zero mention of that in the books anywhere and we have no clue how or when he found out that bit of information. Then there's the bit in COPL where Threepio seems to know an awful lot about Han's lineage, and Han seems to know enough to know that he doesn't want it broadcast to anyone. It's so unclear what he does and doesn't know for sure.

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    5. It seems like the writers of the EU books aren't following the canon.
      In which case, neither will I!
      *evil laugh*
      *starts writing romance story featuring Leia/Yoda*

      (Just kidding!)

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    6. Well, it couldn't be worse than all the Leia/Jabba trollfics that come up on ff. Although I must say the logistics of it are equally challenging...

      OK then! Off to hose off my imagination after thinking about that one.

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  6. According to the Han Solo trilogy, he goes a few years as a kid only knowing the name Han. One night, Dewlanna (the Wookiee cook on the ship he lived on who took care of him) got it out of the ship's captain, Garris Shrike, that his last name was Solo. Han manages to do some investigating on his own and finds out that there is a family on Corellia (or Tralus...can't remember but it's in the Corellian system) w/ the last name Sal-Solo. He runs away from Shrike to try and meet his relatives. He finds Tiion Sal-Solo and her son Thrackan. Tiion and Han's father were siblings making Thrackan Han's first cousin. When Tiion saw Han, she freaked out and keeps saying "they're all gone" or something like that. Assuming that means the Solo clan is all dead but she was kind of a crazy recluse so who knows. Thrackan was a huge douche and bullied Han before finally turning him back over to Shrike. He did a lot of other really bad stuff in the EU too but don't want to ruin that for anyone if you're still into the books. And that's as much as I know!

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    1. OMG, even though I've known the basics of the story for awhile, your description is actually making me want to read the two Solo trilogies for the first time! I'm usually a strict Leia loyalist :-) I guess I'm already planning on breaking that rule for "Kenobi," though, since everyone is saying it's so good. I've told myself, though, that I can't get it until I've finished one other non-SW book!

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    2. Yeah, while there are things that drive me nuts about the Han Solo trilogy, overall I found those books to be enjoyable reads. I mean, you can check out our reviews of them on here, of course.

      There's a blurb out now for "Honor Among Thieves" which is a Han and Leia book before ESB. Why do they have to make me keep reading?

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    3. I had completely given up on the EU until Scoundrels and now the Leia book and Honor... they sucked me back in.... argh. Bye bye spending $ .

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    4. Just to tempt you further: the Rebel Force series is great, and Timothy Zahn's Allegiance and Choices of One are just excellent. And the continuity they set up should be leading right into Razor's Edge. In fact, I'm very interested to see what they do, because at the end of Choices of One Han accepts a commission in the Alliance! Can't wait to see what happens between that and ESB...

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    5. Lady Peter you are sithly tempting me like that... off to my nook account...

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  7. A sweet little story, Blamey, and I think it fits with Han's character. I can really see him not knowing when his real birthday is. Thanks for sharing.

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  8. I have both trilogies, the Daley and the Crispin. I'll have to do a compare and contrast. Haven't read the Daley one in at least 15 years.

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    1. So I'm going on vacation and looking for reading material. Are any of the Daley and Crispin books currently available? Also, does anyone have the last part of Cindy Olson's Committed Trilogy softcopy (Tricks of the Mind - Part 2)?

      And Blamey77, I enjoyed this story. I can totally see this conversation happening between Han and Leia. I imagine that it's these type of conversations that made them attracted to each other.

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  9. Both the Daley and Crispin books are still in print. Amazon has a good deal on the Daley trilogy in a single paperback. Personally I liked Stars end best but the others do set up a decent back story for why Han is desperate enough to take the Jabba run that lands him in trouble before ANH.

    I find the inconsistencies in the Crispin books annoying. Daley avoids Han's childhood but gives heavy hints about his time in the Navy. Definitely worth the read for Han fans even without Leia goodness.

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  10. This was a really cute story. I really enjoyed it. You captured them well. :-)

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  11. Can I just randomly comment that F*** Yea Han & Leia is leading with what might be my all-time favorite H/L photo?

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    1. The one of him kneeling in front of her or the one of them standing in the Falcon cockpit? I'm a fan of both but I love the second one since you don't often get to see them smile, and she's smiling AT HIM rather than the camera :)

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    2. The one of them kneeling makes it look like he's proposing to her. :)

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    3. The cockpit one is great, but the sitting/kneeling one is the photo I was referring to. To me it looks less like a proposal than a casual discussion that's charged with a little more. I find myself wondering if it is a posed publicity still or a candid shot...

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    4. Well, he could be proposing something of entirely different nature. After all, he is a scoundrel.

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    5. The kneeling one makes me imagine Han teasing Leia about their height disparity.
      I also wonder whether it is a candid or posed shot ;)

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    6. Love both those pics! Particularly the kneeling one. Infact I decided that since we can't buy a Han and Leia calendar I would make my own. So just before Christmas last year I bought one of those blank calendars that you can stick your own photos on and plastered H & L all over it! :) Both of those pics were selected as one of my 12 pics!

      And Blamey, I've always thought it was a candid shot.

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  12. It's so good! As soon as I saw that picture, I right-clicked and made desktop image. :D

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  13. This was really cute, Blamey. Very sweet.

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  14. Can someone else read this short article and laugh along with me at the ridiculous amount of factual errors in it? http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2397338/Harrison-Ford-suffers-worst-film-flop-career-new-movie-Paranoia-brings-just-3-5m.html

    Ok, the movie tanked. Whatever. To blame it on Harrison as a "bankable" movie star is ridiculous since it wasn't hit movie to carry, it was Liam Hemsworth's. But that is by far not the worst part. Star Wars came out in 1997? Hans Solo? Air Force One a DOCUDRAMA? Harrison is 72 already? And what is this Star Wars 5 he'll be starring in? Star Wars 5? Where did they even come up with 5? I can maybe see them saying 4 if we forget the prequels, but seriously, who wrote this?

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  15. Lol, that article is insane!!

    And I feel almost embarrassed that it's a British newspaper who should know better. It's almost like they have no idea who Harrison is, the lack of research is almost painful.

    Lets hope "Star Wars 5" is good ;)

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  16. Seeing as I know a tremendous number of people who are already planning to see The New Republic (only one colleague out of my 36 in my department isn't going, but then again, math departments may not represent the population at large (our geek quotient trends high), but friends in other lines of work/contexts are going as well.

    It'll make a crapload of money.

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    1. Sorry, what is The New Republic? Is this the title of episode 7? Sorry if it's common knowledge already, but I've had a stressful weekend.

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    2. We actually saw a first run movie a few months ago and it came up with the opening crawl..and it said, Star Wars: The New Republic, coming to a theater near you in 2015.

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    3. Did you see it in one of your dreams? Or perhaps on a fake, fan-made youtube trailer like this one? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F3t3EPJ5yIA

      Because as of right now, the movie has no name, and if there were teaser trailers playing in movie theaters thousands of internet nerds would've written about it the moment it happened.

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    4. Speaking of dreams... I had one this morning in which I was Princess Leia and I was involved with Han. Luke was there and he was involved with Mara Jade.
      Anyway, Mara Jade gets taken by some, I don't know, evil person enemy thing. And then Luke gets taken. So its up to Han and me (as Leia) to save them. I vaguely remember walking through caves with Han and bumping into children that the 'evil person' had kidnapped. Then Han and I found Luke and Mara, but the evil person had made Mara bad somehow.
      She attacks us and we defend ourselves, temporarily knocking her out.
      I then straddle her unconscious body and try to choke her. Han stops me but Luke points out that we have to kill her to save ourselves (rather dispassionately I might add).

      And then my alarm went off.

      WHAT THE HELL? This isn't the first Star Wars dream I've had (one time I was Luke Skywalker and I climbed up a tree to hide from Darth Vader in a dream) but it is definitely the craziest.

      So I thought I'd share it!

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    5. All I could find about the title for episode 7 was an article on Huffington Post that it may still be a while before we hear anything. They went through the history of when the movie titles have been announced.

      Isn't that always the way, Blamey?

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    6. Regarding the movie title, I didn't think I could have missed it, I mean EVERYONE would know, right? I really wouldn't expect to hear any news on that until next year. It may not even be revealed until the first teaser trailers are playing, so could be a way off yet.

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  17. I guess that was the best Han's birthday subscribtion ever! :D

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