Mother's Day Challenge Submission #5 from JainaDurron7

To Understand

Leia had stored herself away in the shed along with mounds of relics that had once resided on the Falcon. She and Han had finished sorting most of it weeks ago, making more or less organized stacks around the shed outside their new home on Corellia. She’d been surprised by some of what they’d found. Half of it was junk; broken hyperdrive parts, rusty motivators, old spare parts that Han refused to get rid of. But buried under the junk, they’d found mementos of their lives back from the days when Han had just been a mercenary and Leia merely a princess without a planet. Poor Luke- who had volunteered to help clean out- had been less than amused by some of these mementos such as a few left behind from long nights late into a certain trip to Bespin  . . .
 

Leia and Han had finished sorting the garbage from the treasures, and had packed it all away again, save for a few crates Leia almost wished she hadn’t found. She had just about forgotten them when Han had recovered them from the depths of the Falcon’s smuggling compartments (half of which had unfortunately turned into storage bins during mad dashes for room). When she saw them again, Leia had recognized and immediately known that she did not want to open those crates anytime soon. Or did she?
  She’d felt decidedly conflicted at the sight of the simple gray crates- the labels on the sides being the only markings to distinguish them from any other set of crates. They were smaller than the standard size but big enough to pack something small. Like holos. And Leia knew the crates to be packed full of holos. Sitting on the floor of the shed, her legs spread out before her, Leia tore her gaze from the holo sitting before her to the opened crate beside her. She glanced over the labels, reading every few as her eyes quickly skimmed across the gray tabs. She’d forgotten that there were so many and yet she couldn’t bring herself to watch a single one. She blew a sigh out her nose, removing her arm from the crate with a flop as she turned back to the one that sat in front of her. Flipping it over, she reread its label only to lose her composure. Leia threw her head back, sniffling as she wiped her face with the front of her hand, then back. Of all the junk sitting around, there couldn’t be any handkerchiefs! She wiped her hand off on the leg of her pants, hardly caring anymore.
 

“There you are.” Startled, Leia looked up to see her daughter approaching. Jaina didn’t smile at her but frowned with worry. “I shouldn’t have been able to sneak up on you like that.” Leia pursed her lips, shrugging. She waved a hand to motion for Jaina to sit with her and the younger woman complied, settling down to squish herself against her mother’s side so they could sit together in the middle of Leia’s mess. “I’m sorry; I’m tired today.”

 

“Sure you are,” Jaina smirked. But her amusement was short-lived and she sighed shortly, her gaze moving around to take in the mess her mother had surrounded herself with. “I know how you feel. This year doesn’t feel right without Jacen.” She paused. “When we were younger, he’d always wake up early, rush into my room and remind me what day it was. . . . It felt so wrong this morning, even thinking about my Life Day without him.”
 

Leia didn’t respond. She was torturing her lower lip between both her teeth, biding her time in the vain hope that Jaina would make some effort to change the conversation’s direction. Long ago, that would have been Jaina’s go-to reaction. Now, Leia knew she was much too mature to skid around a subject, but face it, deal with it, and get it out of the way. She leaned back to look at her daughter; it never ceased to amaze her how fast she’d grown up, changed.
 


Jaina caught her inspecting gaze and gave her a soft, artificial smile in return. She reached for the silent holo, took it into her own hands and studied it. “What are you watching?”
 

Subtly, she shook her head, such a small move Jaina almost missed it. “Actually, I’m not watching anything right now,” she quipped, indicating the unmoving holo.
 

Jaina’s smile returned, but this time it was genuine and comically sour.

“Smart mouth. Who’s the mature one here?”
 
Leia managed to return a smile back, some sign of life returning to her eyes. She watched Jaina as she briefly studied the holo in her hand. At once, Jaina’s features twisted with sorrow, her brows drawing together and her mouth opening in surprise. It took her a second to recover before the corners of her mouth turned up in a gentle smile and she glanced sideways at Leia. “‘Jaya and Jasa come home’”, she read aloud. “Don’t tell me you’ve been agonizing yourself with these home holovids all day.”
 
Leia shrugged shortly. “Just for the past- few hours.”
 
“Blast, Mom!” Jaina rolled her eyes. She snuggled closer into her mom’s side. “Unless you’re going to smile, I think you should put these away.”
 
“Jaina, I . . . Just leave them, okay? I just want to-” She broke off.
 
“Dad is worried about you.”
 
“He told you that?”
 
Jaina shook her head. “Didn’t need to. He wanted my help assessing the situation and I think I’ve already come to a conclusion about what I think you should happen here.”
 
“Jaina, leave them! Please.”
 
“I don’t think you should be watching any more of these unless you’re going to watch them with happier thoughts.”
 
Leia sighed, letting her head fall to rest on her daughter’s shoulder. “We’ll see. Now, that can’t be the only reason you’re here. Talk to me. Have you come up with any ideas as to what you want for your Life Day?”
 
“Why do you always ask me that?” Jaina chortled. “You’re going to buy me something different anyway.”
 
“Maybe. I just need ideas.”
 
“You don’t need a single hint. You always ask and you always get me something completely different. But it’s always better than whatever I asked for anyway.”
 
“Then, just answer me and we can get this part of the process done with.”
 
She huffed. “Fine. But I’ve really been thinking about it this year and I think I came up with something good.”
 
Leia sealed her lips, raising her gaze. “Mmm. I’m listening.”
 
Jaina nudged her. “I’m serious! I think I came up with the un-toppable idea this time.”
 
“Impossible.”
 
“I want the one thing you never got to give me.”
 
Leia didn’t have to ask; somehow, she just knew. Her veins filled with fresh, freezing cold guilt. She glanced sideways at her daughter, perturbed, to say the least. She thought she’d had a response ready, but she must have seen it unfit because she opened her mouth and no words came.
 
From the corner of her eye,  she noticed Jaina watching her, watching her expression subtly change as she weighed her words. Jaina inhaled slowly, tossing her hands into her lap. “I miss you and Dad.”
 
“Then, maybe you shouldn’t be moving to Csilla.”
 
Jaina nudged her mother with her shoulder, but when Leia looked back to her, she didn’t look upset or even disappointed. She merely shrugged, her smile becoming bitter. “You’re probably right. It’s not just that I miss you guys, though. When I was packing, I realized that I really miss the memories we didn’t get together.”
 
“You just figured that out?”
 
She shook her head. “I just figured out how much it truly bothers me. I’ve always missed it.”
 
“Then what’s the difference now?”
 
Jaina just looked at her for a moment. “I want to it to change.”
 
Leia’s laugh was short, more bitter than Jaina’s smile. Her gaze dropped to her lap and she began to pick at “I’m sorry. That opportunity flew away the moment I let Winter take you three.” She bit down on her lip- hard- but the thought still evoked a fresh round round of tears that Leia needed to cry out.

 
“Or, maybe it hasn’t.” Jaina jumped to her feet, then reached down a hand to help her mother up. “I’m willing to bet we still have time.”
 
All her words seemed to be failing her today, so Leia didn’t respond. She let Jaina pull her around, played along with her dialogue.
 
Pulling her mother away from her mess of holos, Jaina quirked her lips, all the bitterness leaving her demeanor. “I have come to believe that there is still time left in our lives for the two of us to become friends.
 
The mother frowned. “Is this what our relationship has come to?”
 
Jaina ignored her. “Mom, for my Life Day, I want to make a deal with you.”
 
Leia waited for more. “What?”

 
“Well, with my Life Day coming up-” She paused to flash Leia an amused smile as she added, “and Mother’s Day- I’ve been thinking a lot about this. It’s been bothering me lately, so I thought I’d mention it to you that I’m willing to make the effort to fix things.”
 
“You say that like we’re broken.
 
“I don’t think we’re broken. Though, I do think things could be better. Listen. Remember after Anakin died, when Mara and Uncle Luke sent Ben to the Maw? Then, we had that whole conversation about- how I finally understood-”
 
Leia stopped her, quickly nodding her head. She’d let Jaina believe what she had wanted. At that time, she’d been so relieved to see that her daughter had finally reached some level of understanding as to why Leia had done what she did and that it hadn’t been easy, but she knew Jaina still couldn’t truly understand it like Leia always had. “Yes, Jaina, I remember.”
 
“So, we understand each other. Now, I want to actually have a relationship with you, Mom. I don’t just want to be your daughter.”
 
Leia saw Jaina’s head still working, words still sitting on the edge of her tongue, waiting to fly off, so Leia went with it and asked, “What do you mean?”
 
“I mean … I told Jag that I can’t leave Corellia.”
 
“What?”
 
“Yeah, he wasn’t the happiest about it, but I told him that this matters to me. You, Dad, and Allana are all that I have left. And you and Dad … I still need you guys. And, Mom, you’ve always been my mother. Of course! But I don’t want a mother.” Se rolled her lips between her teeth briefly before she finished her statement, her eyes turning glassy with coming tears. “I want a mom. I want a friend.”
 
Leia didn’t know what to say, how to respond. She knew exactly what Jaina meant, what she was trying to get at; but it frightened her in an odd way just because her daughter was right and they’d never had a relationship like that. Things between the two of them had always been a fine layer of ice and Leia had gotten used to slowly, cautiously tiptoeing her way around the rink. As hard as she’d ever tried, the two of them had never been close like that. Whenever she’d dared to take an actual step, things always turned back to Winter and New Alderaan and Leia didn’t want to lose her daughter over that again.

 
Jaina glanced around the mess of holos on the floor, her look sad but her mouth smiling. “Hey, maybe you still need me too.”

 
Though she knew for sure what was happening, she needed to hear it. “Just say it, Jaina.”

 
Jaina giggled to herself, amused by whatever she was thinking. “Sometimes, I think it would be fun to be one of those weird mother and daughter duos that do everything together. You know, they’re always going out to lunch and going shopping together.”
 
Leia raised a brow. “Go shopping? You?”
 
Jaina shrugged, turning away from Leia. She looked back at her mother over her shoulder, a mischievous twinkle in her eye. “Maybe the day is approaching.”
 
“Fine, if you want to go shopping. Just let me comm Doctor Cilghal first, alright?”
 
She laughed, pacing around.
 
“Jaina, I don’t think we’re that kind of mother and daughter pair.”
 
“I don’t think so, either,” she agreed, planting her hands against her hips. “I just mean to say that I want to be closer to you like that. I’m finally learning how much I appreciate you and everything you’ve done for me. And for Anakin and Jacen. I understand now like I never have before.” Her smile suddenly melted away, replaced by a genuine expression of deep empathy and an almost happy kind of sadness. What Leia read through that look was something she understood all too well. It irked her to see Jaina wear it so genuinely …
 
“Before, I didn’t understand. Not really. I was a teenager and an idiot. Not that there’s much difference between the two, but . . .”
 
“But?”

 
Jaina stopped just as she had turned so that she was once again facing Leia. She bit down on her lip. “For the longest time, I took you and everything you sacrificed for me for granted. I’m not going to do that ever again. I get it now. I really do. You did everything you had to. I didn’t understand that even when we were talking about it, but I get it now. You- you didn’t have anyone to help you, no mother to ask for advice. It was just you and Dad and the two of you did whatever you had to do. And it’s amazing how you did that. I can’t imagine trying to grow up and figure out life without you because- even if you weren’t always right there by us, you were always there for us.”
 
Perhaps it wasn’t Jaina’s words so much as how she said them, how the Force rang with the sweet truth as it flowed around her, through her. Leia did not miss it. She felt it. She recognized it. And it all slowly sunk in.
 
“Mom. I get it now. I get it like you do. You have no idea how thankful I am that I still have you because I’m going to need you now more than I ever have.”
 
Leia finally found the confirmation she’d been looking for in the Force and she couldn’t help the gigantic smile she got when her gaze found her daughter again. Jaina smiled joyously, nodding.
 
“Jaina!” Leia gasped, taking one long step forward and flinging her arms out to embrace her child. Jaina was shaking with her bubbling laughter, but she squeezed her back, nestling her head on her mother’s shoulder. “I’m just glad that I have you here to help me out,” she told her.
 
“Oh, Jaina! Of course!” Jaina laughed again.
 
“Now, how’s that for an early Mother’s Day gift?”
 
Leia raised a brow. “You couldn’t wait a week?”
 
“Jag insisted that we wait until dinner on my Life Day, but I couldn’t help myself.”
 
Leia chuckled shortly. “You’ve never been very patient.”
 
“Are you complaining? Jacen and I came on time to make you a mother on Mother’s Day.”
 
“That’s right. And you made the greatest gift. And, Jaina?”
 
“Hm?”
 
“You know that I’m always here. We’ve still got time.”

Mother's Day Challenge Submissions #4 from Erma

Smile

(Notes (disclaimer?):For the record, I’m not a fan of TFA, and I’m on the fence about what to make of the Aftermath books’ telling of H/L/Ben. But I am cool with thinking that Han and Leia had a son named Ben, that they loved him very much, that Han and Leia were the best parents they knew how to be, that Ben had trouble growing up (because what kid doesn’t?), and that TFA is just a weird visual-media fanfic with actors who look amazingly like our OT heroes, but who aren’t really them at all, because seriously, how could TFA really happen to our heroes? So yeah, Ben Solo is here, but it’s not a TFA Ben. :) )

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Leia had never really thought about whether becoming a parent was a good idea – until now. The revelation of the truth of her parentage had been an unwelcome shock, but she knew Luke, she knew him: whatever had happened that resulted in Vader, it wasn’t a given that having such darkness in one’s family tree would necessarily result in future generations embodying that darkness as well. Growing up in the Palace on Alderan, and as part of her duties to her people as Princess, she was frequently around babies and children, so she was certainly familiar with, and fond of, children. Though she had been too focused on her work in the Senate and then the Rebellion to think seriously about having children (or whether she would even be alive to have them), she wasn’t at all opposed to having them. Even when she and Han had learned she was pregnant, they went through the usual emotional zero-g course that expecting parents ride, including denial and acceptance, excitement and dread. And for Force’s sake: Leia had played an active role in leading an intergalactic war. She had been responsible for the lives of numbers of beings. But it was different now. Now…

“…you’re wondering if having Ben was a good idea?”

Leia looked sharply at her friend. Her usually exceptional abilities to control her emotions and maintain her composure, honed from years of being in the public eye, were, quite frankly, no match at all for post-partum hormones and weeks of sleepless nights tending to a hungry, growing, non-verbal baby. It had taken awhile for these two friends, these two war veterans, sitting together and talking quietly about motherhood, to get to this point in conversation. But Shara had finally hit the mark. The tears immediately started to well up. Leia gave up the fight for composure and nodded affirmatively.

Shara smiled knowingly, radiating only pure understanding and support. As her young son Poe played quietly nearby, pulling random pieces from the pile of colored building blocks to assemble creations that vaguely resembled spacecraft, Shara leaned forward and took Leia’s hand in her own.

“Leia, Ben is perfectly normal. Babies cry, sometimes all the time. They’re hungry, sometimes all the time. You get no time to yourself, no sleep. Nothing. And it wears on you.” Leia opened her mouth to interrupt, but Shara continued. “It’s different from the war. Yeah, sure, it was stressful and we never got sleep then. But a baby…” She gazed over at her son, who was engrossed in what seemed to be (if his sound effects were any indication) a battle between spacecraft (very square, multicolord spacecraft). “A baby is different. It’s completely dependent on you. And you know it, in every atom of your being. Nature is against us here: a baby’s cries are literally biologically tuned to get a rise out of you.” Shara glanced pointedly back to Leia, with a distinctly mischievous smile. “Your baby is going to be worse for you than Han ever could be.”

Leia finally laughed—a quick, choked laugh, but still, a laugh. Both women sat back and relaxed.

Shara continued. “And Leia, you’re perfectly normal, too. Sure, some new mothers may not ever question their sanity, which is fine. But it’s also perfectly normal to have serious doubts. And to make it worse, it may still be weeks before Ben gives you his first true smile. Until then, well, he’s just going to be this wiggly, crying blob that is only adorable and clearly worth all the trouble when he’s fast asleep.”

Leia’s shoulders drooped. “Which is rarely.”

Shara shrugged. “Yeah. For now. But that will change.”

The women grew quiet as Poe’s spacecraft battle came to a pause. They watched as he began to assemble what looked like a small droid (or luggage). Leia sighed, not exactly contentedly, but at least somewhat comforted. “Thank you, Shara. It’s good to talk with you. We’re certainly so happy that Ben is in our lives. It’s just… “

Shara smiled knowingly again. “It’s just a lot harder than you expected?”

“Yes.”

Poe’s droid (not luggage) found a seat in one of the craft, and the battle resumed. Shara considered her friend. “Well. If it helps at all, half the time I still think Kes and I made a huge mistake, and that I’m not cut out to be a mother.”

Leia’s eyes grew wide. “And the other half of the time?”

“The rest of the time, I think Poe is the most perfect creature to have ever existed in the galaxy, and I honestly can’t think of a better idea than to have welcomed him into our lives.”

Leia smiled. Again, Shara had hit a mark. That feeling was something Leia was familiar with, and she had indeed felt as well…  of course, only when tiny Ben was fast asleep. So, rarely.

As if on cue, the sound of Ben’s cries in the sleeping quarters reached the women. After a few moments of fussing, as the women waited to see if the fathers would be able to soothe the crying child, Han strode out carrying tiny Ben in his arms, Kes Dameron following along.

“Sorry to interrupt, Sweetheart,” Han said wearily as the male entourage reached the gathering room, “but I think our little guy wants his mama.”

Kes shook his head. “Nah, buddy, that’s definitely a hungry cry. Poe used to make that sound all the time when he wanted to –“

 “What are you talking about?” Shara threw to Kes, cutting him off. “Ben sounds like he needs to be changed! When Poe was –“

Ben let out a loud wail, cutting both friends off momentarily. Leia looked anxiously at Ben, then Han, as Han sat down next to her. “No,” Leia said, “I think Han’s right, he just wants me to hold him.”

Poe watched the crying child with normal childhood curiosity, while Shara and Kes continued their normal parent-friends' duty of offering of various thoughts about how to soothe the baby. But the Damerons slowly faded into the periphery of the Organa-Solo’s awareness as the new mother and father looked with concern to their newborn son.

Han handed Ben to Leia—and they paused. A different look had come over Ben’s face. Without a word, they both knew: Ben was actually seeing his mother. Han and Leia held their breath. For the first time, tiny Ben’s eyes locked with his mother’s, forging a solid connection between human beings. Slowly, his features changed…

Ben looked into his mother ‘s eyes and smiled an honest, true, happy, bubbly baby smile.

And Leia knew without a doubt: Ben was the most amazing creature to have ever existed in the galaxy, and she knew it was the best idea to have welcomed him into their lives.

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Mother's Day Challenge Submission #3 from Jediofgrace

"There you are."

Leia turned in her rocking chair to see her husband step through the doorway and smiled.

"Are they okay?" Han asked quietly as he saw the twins were sleeping.

She nodded. "I just wanted to watch them for awhile."

He walked over to where she was sitting next to the crib. He rested his elbows on the edge of the crib, looking down at their sleeping children. The toddler twins were tucked close together, Jacen’s little hand resting on Jaina’s stomach, as if he fell asleep tickling her.

"It's nice to see them holding still for once," Han said with a chuckle.

Leia rose from her chair and stood next to him, their arms automatically encircling each other.

"I know. They have enough energy to wear out a gundaark.”

“Must be the Solo blood in them.”

“Must be. But why is it I’m the one who gets up early with them every morning while you sleep?”

“Hey, you know my energy doesn’t kick in until about noon.” Han pulled her closer and kissed the top of her head. "Have you thought more about having another one?"

Leia untucked just enough of his shirt for her hand to slip inside. "I was thinking I might even like a couple more."

He moved her to stand in front of him, kissing her, slow and sweet. Her arms wrapped around him, untucking the rest of his shirt in search of his warm skin.

“You think you have the energy for that?” He teased. Her hands slid upwards.

“I do if you do.”

"Mmm, Princess, we can have as many as you want."

Mother's Day Challenge Submission #2 from infamousnalani

"How Far We've Come" by infamousnalani

Freezing temperatures and the imminent threat of death couldn’t eradicate the rebels’ festivity as they prepared to welcome a new standard year. A spontaneous celebration had erupted in the mess hall that enticed even the most secluded of people. Various alcohols had been brought out from under bunks and smuggling compartments on the Falcon and troops gathered around a table to gamble and watch smashball. The holiday cheer seemed to have infected everyone except for a certain princess, which did not go unnoticed by Han Solo.

It was the first new year since their entourage had been thrown together and Leia had never felt so defeated. The traditions and comforts of her old life had died with her planet and she had found herself struggling to overcome the emptiness she felt in her life. She reached for a glass of one of the cruder liquors and downed it and, having done it numerous times within the past two hours, hardly grimaced anymore.

Throughout the night, Han had been counting her drinks from across the room at the expense of his friends’ conversations. In the short amount of time that he had known her, Han had never seen the princess drinking to drown her emotions. He wordlessly excused himself from their discussion about ships and Sabacc to approach Leia.

“How are you holding up?”

Leia stumbled as she turned around to face him. “Uh-uh, not today Solo.” Her hips shifted and her feet scrambled to maintain her balance. “I don’t want to do this right now.”

Han rolled his eyes and grabbed her arm to prevent her from falling. “It’s time to go.”

Leia protested in his grasp and, with a newly found bravado, attempted to push him away from her. A “I’m fine” slurred through her teeth.

“You’re not ‘fine’. You’ve had five shots in two hours and you have zero coordination. Leave before you draw attention to yourself.”

Leia slumped into his chest, which he took as a sign of resignation. He lifted her off the ground and gathered her legs on his arms until she appeared to be resting comfortably. The walk to her quarters was characterized by silence and fleeting eye contact as Leia stared inquisitively into Han’s, which darted around the dimly lit passages. After fumbling with the door, Han made his way over to Leia’s bunk and placed her in it gently. Noticing that Leia had been eying him for a good while now, Han broke the silence.

“What?”

“Tell me about our babies.”

The request caught him off guard, but intrigued him nonetheless. “What?”

“It’s crazy,” she drawled out, “the idea of me – a princess – and a guy like you…” She trailed off before shutting her eyes tight. “People keep telling me that you love me.” She let an uncharacteristic laugh and grabbed his hand to shake his arm. “Tell me about them.”

He cleared his throat. “Which parts?”

“All of them.” She responded hazily.

“Well,” Han started. “There’s a boy, and then a little girl. The boy with wild, unmanageable hair, of course, and the girl with crazy braids that shouldn’t be possible.”

Leia’s focus shifted from his eyes to the scar on his chin and she ran her thumb across it.

“Stubborn. But loving, too. Strong willed and determined. Dark chocolate colored eyes and maybe a bit shorter than average.”

Leia had slipped into the waves of unconsciousness as the need for sleep overtook her. Han’s eyes softened at the sight of her and he slipped out of the room, stuck with the image of a small human that was half Leia and half him pulling at Chewie’s hair and the sound of tiny feet patting the floor as they ran excitedly through the Falcon. He paused outside the door and let the air cool his lungs. Shaking his head, he put the image out of his head and made his way back to the Millennium Falcon for the night.

The crisp night air left Leia chilled as she and Han made their way back to their provided hut amongst the Endor treetops. Nerves coursed their way through her body, further amplified by the light breeze that whisked past them.

“I feel like we should’ve been there by now.” She commented.

“I can’t find the damned place.” The day’s events had only caused Han’s frustration to simmer and he was eager to find himself alone with Leia for the first night since their trip to Cloud City.

“Well should we just turn back?”

“No.” He hadn’t intended the venom that infused his tone and immediately regretted the snap. “I’m sorry.”

“Let’s just find it.”

Nine paces and one right turn later, they’d stumbled upon the empty hut. The hearth was burning serenely, no doubt begun by the hospitality of one of the indigenous creatures. Leia collapsed on the makeshift bed, finding comfort at a surprising rate. Han stood motionless at the closed door and eyed the illuminated insides.

“Come to bed, Han.”

He sighed and rubbed his eyes. “Are you sure you want this?”

The exchange on the bridge flashed in Leia’s mind. “Yes, why wouldn’t I? Come here.”

Han tentatively made his way over and sat next to her. “You seemed upset with me earlier.”

“I wasn’t… I’m,” she paused. “I’m just afraid.” Her eyes glazed over and she clenched them shut to resist the beginning of tears. She exhaled before continuing, “Everything I have might be gone tomorrow.”

Han attempted to soothe her by running his fingers through her hair. “You’re alright, we’re alright. We’ll make it through.”

“It’s not us I’m worried about; it’s Luke.”

Han missed a beat as a result of the sparks of jealousy that flared within him. “He’s a Jedi, he can hold his own.”

Leia shook her head in rebuttal. “Vader’s his father.” She pondered disclosing the other information she had learned while talking to Luke but couldn’t muster enough courage to confront it herself.

Han wrapped his arm around her frame and grabbed her hand, stroking it with his thumb in an effort to ease her tension.

Leia sniffled and rolled over to face him. “Do you remember the New Year’s party on Hoth? You took me back to my quarters and you told me what our kids will be like.”

“Uh, listen here, Princess.” Han gave the hand in his a squeeze. “You asked me to. But yeah, I might remember that.” He smiled softly at her. “The real question is how do you? You were beyond wasted.”

She moved to rest her head on his chest and felt her anxiety melting away. “I’m not sure how. But you got something wrong.”

“Did I?”

“Yes. That our daughter’s going to have you wrapped around her pinky finger, you old softie.”

“You’re not much better.” He continued after noticing the curiosity in his beloved’s eyes, not unlike the last time they’d had this conversation. “Your son’s gonna make you late to work every day because he’s not gonna be happy until you give him exactly 17 hugs before you walk out the door.”

“My son?” She laughed.

“Your son.”

Leia sighed contentedly and fidgeted with one of the buttons on his shirt. “I want that one day. Babies, I mean.” She stole a glance at Han’s face before continuing. “I want the antics and the babbling and the laughter and the wide-eyed curiosity.” Han chucked at the last part. “What?”

“Nothing.” He placed a kiss at the top of her head. “Soon, sweetheart, I promise. First let’s make it through tomorrow.”

Six standard months had passed since the fall of the Empire and Leia had been met with a newly found exhaustion. Being tasked with developing an intergalactic government tired her out more than partaking in strategies for the rebellion ever did and too worn out to be intimate with Han despite their newly established union.

She had been rearranging and reorganizing her office when she was interrupted by a knock on the door. She pressed the button to allow the visitor in, whom she had recognized as soon as they’d entered the high-rising Coruscant building. Her brother emerged from behind the sliding door and embraced her.

“I’m not bothering you, am I?”

“No. I’ve actually been reorganizing my already organized paperwork.” She motioned to the various color-coded folders and labels sprawled out on her desk. “So it’s nice to have a distraction.”

Luke beamed at her. “You got that from dad.”

“And his anger issues too, apparently.” She deadpanned. “At least this will amount to some good, if we’re lucky.”

“Who needs luck when you have me?” He teased but it quickly lost its comedic value when Leia socked him in the shoulder.

“You’ve been spending too much time around my husband. God, that still feels so weird to say.”

“How are you guys? I’ve been meditating and I felt that you were troubled by something.”

“Not troubled,” she went to sit at her desk. “Just exhausted. This job is taking so much out of me.” Luke pulled out the chair from across from her and sat in it. “Something just feels different.”

“Have you tried meditating?” He looked around at the clutter surrounding them. Based off that alone, he could tell that she hadn’t. “Just take some time for introspection. I’ll walk you through it.”

Leia’s resolve fell and she stood up to sit on the floor next to him. She wasn’t expecting much to come from it because of her inexperience with the Force but decided to try it nonetheless. Following Luke’s directions to retreat her mind into a pleasurable place, she found herself laying next to Han in an early morning. She recognized the scene, it was nearly a month ago and the sun had yet to infiltrate their small apartment. The chronometer read 04:27, two hours before she had to be up. Han had pulled her close to his body and was placing kisses on her jawline.

“Han, it’s so early,” she mumbled into her pillow.

“We can go back to sleep if you want.” His hands squeezed her thigh and the time was ultimately forgotten.

Her rumination then brought her to various other moments following that morning that flagged her conscious until she felt a radiant, youthful energy within her. Her eyes shot open and she struggled to catch her breath.

“What’d you see?” Luke questioned calmly, he evidently already knew.

“I need to go home.” Leia hastily gathered her paperwork and belongings and left Luke alone surrounded by stacks of paperwork.

She had bounded through their front door in record time and kicked off her shoes in a manner unlike herself. Han was in the kitchen carefully following a recipe on a datapad.

“Hey, sweetheart.” He decreased the heat on the stove and moved to embrace her. He placed an affectionate kiss on her forehead. “I didn’t think you’d be home for another hour or so.”

“Something came up.” She dropped her head sheepishly in an attempt to conceal her smile. “You know that game we play, the one where we talk about our future kids?”

“Mhmm.”

Leia wrapped her hands around the base of Han’s neck. “You said soon.”

“I did.”

“How soon is nine months?”

Han’s expression went from incredulous to incandescent before Leia even had time to process his reaction. He had encircled her in his arms and twirled her off the ground. “It’s a little short notice but I think we’ll be alright.”

“You’re so dumb,” she laughed, dangling her feet.

“I love you.” He whispered into her ear and kissed her temple before setting her back on the ground.

Leia’s smile sent electricity down his spine. “We’re starting our family.”

“My own family.” He grabbed both of her hands. “You keep giving me more than I could ever give you.”

“You gave me everything when I gave you nothing.”

He was confused. “When?”

“Every moment up until that first kiss.”

“Look how far we’ve come.”

Mother's Day Challenge Submission #1 from cv73

You Won't Go Wrong

"I don’t know what we're going to do."

Han sounds as lost as she's ever heard him, in these scant months since the Death Star, since Han has sort of, maybe, perhaps been part – no, adjacent to – the Rebel Alliance. Hauled cargo, run blasters, brought refugees, found them cheap ships to rebuild. Protesting all the way, but always coming back. He's squatting down next to the bed, rubbing a hand across his face and she can hear the beard stubble as he does. She's never seen him with a beard, but she might by the end of this.

Then again, Leia feels as lost as he does. They're stuck in the middle of some ridiculous almost pre-space flight town on a planet that trades only in certain areas. The Imperials are everywhere, hunting them, hunting someone, hunting. Armed patrols in the streets.

And they're in a rattletrap inn, kilometers from the port and a way out, huddled in one room, the pair of them.

Oh, and Luke, lying in a shivering, sweating mass under a blanket that Han declared he wouldn't use to wash down the Falcon. Sick with Ryshallen Fever, an illness she and Han had been vaccinated against as children, but they were from Core Worlds. An Outer Rim desert planet was always overlooked for the latest vaccines and its heat and lack of water would kill most germs. So a childhood illness had taken him down…and was only making him sicker by the moment.

She's sitting on the bed next to Luke. She'd tried to coax some water down his throat, bring him back, but he seems to be slipping further into a dream, muttering "not now, Aunt Beru." She settles for rubbing his shoulder, thinking there has to be something they can do. But like Han, she is running out of options.

"We need to get him out of here." She sighs, and Han meets her eyes.

"No, really, that was not on my list." He shakes his head, looking at her apologetically. "I'm thinking our best bet is for me to get us a speeder, we can bundle him in it, and haul ass for the port."

"But neither of us has enough credits to get a speeder."

"I wasn't thinking legally – "

"And if you steal one, the Imperials could be on to us."

"I'd considered that, sweetheart. I just don't know what else we can do. We can't wait for this to burn out, he's goin' under now. If we find a doctor around here, who knows if they won't just turn us over to the Imperials? That's our options. Hell, we don't even know if we take him to one, they'll know how to treat him. And the longer we stick around –"

"I know!" she snaps. "But you could go steal that speeder, get picked up by the Imperials and then where are we?"

"Well, they'd at least dose Luke up with something to stop the fever before they haul us all to Lord Vader," he says sourly.

Leia is ready to scream at him, but then he reaches out and strokes Luke's blond hair back from his forehead. "Poor kid. Next thing the Rebellion does, steal some damn vaccines. He might not be the only one."

"No." she says softly, amazed at the change in Han's expression, from hardened smuggler to what she and Luke call, behind his back of course, Han the Soft Touch. It sneaks out in tiny moments, but they'd taken to conspiratorially compiling them. She's heard him call Luke "kid" a thousand times at least, but this time… "He doesn't mind you calling him that, does he?"

Han is still looking at Luke and doesn't meet her eyes. "No. I'll probably call him that when we're both grey with grandchildren, he'll still be younger."

She doesn't dare derail his thought train – that they'll all ever be that old and still alive to be friends - but she can't resist. "You with grandchildren?"

He shoots her a grin. "Sure. Bound to happen someday, I guess. I could see myself with kids. I'd sure as hell treat 'em better than I ever got treated. And Luke? Hell, you know he'll have kids – he loves everyone…he'll have a pack of dreamers, like him." Han sits back on his heels, his hazel eyes at last finding hers. "What about you, Princess?"

"What about…children?" She's struck by the question at first, that Han would even think about it. She's thought in odd moments that if there ever is a peace, she wants children – what are they fighting for but for the future? And she wants a family – she needs one now that hers is lost. "First duty of a royal house is to have children. I was adopted, like Luke. My parents couldn't have children of their own, so they adopted me. I was a war orphan."

"But do you want them? I mean -" He winces as if he realizes again about Alderaan and she has to give him that much. There's a depth under that cynical layer or he wouldn't be here, with her and Luke, trying to find a way out for all of them. If he were really a mercenary, he'd've run long ago.

She meets his suddenly serious gaze. "Yes, I do. I want children – even if there's no more Alderaan to lead, it's in my memory and I will teach it to my children. But I want them to be born free – free of this Empire."

She wonders why they've taken this turn, into this ramble, with the Empire possibly closing in and Luke growing sicker by the moment. There's a vaccine for Ryshallen because it can kill. She knows that neither she nor Han will let that happen if it takes everything they have. She's still not sure what her feelings, really, are for either of them, if something more could develop for Han as he seems to want in the moments they aren't arguing, if she gives it a chance, or why the farmboy from the Outer Rim seems to have some part of her she can't identify. But she does know one thing under all the flirting and sniping from Han, the boundless optimism from Luke – something wove them together from the start. She has the sense that if they do all survive to having children – grandchildren – that they will be together. This war won't tear them apart. Han can protest all he wants about leaving, but he's not going. Luke's not going to die of some childhood illness that he should have been protected from if this galaxy had any justice beyond who has the most weapons and power.

She waits for Han to ruin the moment, as he often does, with a snarky joke. But this time, he doesn't. He simply nods, looks again at Luke. "Then we gotta start by getting us outa here. See if you can get him a least a little mobile, I'm gonna go steal us a ride." He gets wearily to his feet. 

She can't resist. "Nothing flashy." She gives it a scolding tone, and as she expects – hopes - he rises to the bait.

"Look, Your Worship, I'm a smuggler – you think I'm gonna get us a flashy getaway ride?"

"Well, I don't know – "

"Would you two stop?"

And they both do at the mumble from Luke.

"Welcome back to the living," she says, looking at his eyes, half closed against even the dim light. "Feel any better?"

"No," he croaks and she reaches to bring him water. After a sip or two, he almost smiles. "But I will make it into whatever speeder you steal, Han."

She touches his forehead and maybe the fever has gone down a little. At least he knows who they are.

Han leans over to touch Luke's shoulder and manages a grin. "Good, Junior, I'm holding you to that." He straightens and heads for the door. "I'll comm you the second I get it runnin', you two be ready." His familiar crooked grin is for her, and he winks as he heads out the door.

This is her family now.

How About a Mother's Day Challenge?

Anyone interested in another challenge? Mother's Day in the US is coming up on Sunday, although as usual there is no deadline for this challenge. We've done this one before and only got a couple of submissions, but even if we only get one or two, sometimes it's still fun to get people writing.

So, the point isn't really to pretend it is Mother's Day in the galaxy far, far away. Although if you want to do that, you of course can. But just something that kind of showcases Leia as a mom. You can use the Legends kids, you can use kids you made up for them on your own, and I guess if you are prepared for the potential backlash you can use Ben. I'm sure there is even a way to write a story for this challenge without even naming the kids or telling us how many of them there are. Get creative!

If you want to give it a shot, just keep the length fairly reasonable for what would fit in a blog post and submit to me through email. I post these stories in the order in which I receive them.

Happy Star Wars Day! May the Fourth Be With You!

I'm not sure when May the Fourth "officially" became Star Wars day, but for any of you who were not aware, tomorrow is the big day. Because, well, May the Fourth. Apparently there are even some celebrations happening around the country.

I know more recently a lot of us have been kind of caught up in all the worst things about what has been going on. But let's try and remember all the great stuff. The three amazing movies that captivated all of us, resonated on a level that is next to impossible to replicate, and somehow totally hold up even 40 years later. I still love listening to the music, the movies still get me, and I've mostly been able to block out the bad stuff.

These movies have also given us inspiration for our writing, or for those of you who just read, it gives you great things to read. And we also of course have each other, and our little community here or elsewhere on the internet where you might hang out and converse with other fans. I've "met" and also literally met some really cool people because of all of this. And it's been really nice to find other people who are equally obsessed, but also functional humans and not just total weirdos ;)  I mean, yeah, we're all probably a little weird but then the outside world doesn't have to know that, do they?

So, go forth and wear your Star Wars tshirts. Watch the movies if you have time. Bust out some of your fun Star Wars merchandise. Read some fanfic, anything that brings you happiness because of these movies.